Last night, I got angry. Not even really angry about something super serious like someone-broke-into-my-house-and-stole-my-favourite-frypan, just angry because things weren't going my way. Sadly, my first response was, I WANT TO EAT THAT COOKIE. I didn't eat the cookie, I walked away, but that very thought surprised me. It almost caught me off guard. I think it's the first time ever I've fully recognized the connection between an emotion and the desire to eat. Usually whenever that flash of emotion hits, I just eat. Of course, usually after I stuff my face I feel as rotten as I did before I ate, only possibly worse.
I guess that in my head I knew that, but I hadn't really made the connection before. On top of that, I wish I had the answer to write here that I knew exactly what to do to stop this from happening, but I don't know yet. The only thing I think is that I have to turn my emotions to God for help, rather than to food for help. I don't think that's easy, or that it's going to be easy. Food is accepting, it's more of a risk to turn your emotion on God, he might tell me that it's ME that needs to change. It feels like that has been a consistent theme lately.
To constant change.
190.2 lbs - down 9 inches
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